Nicholas Cage KICKs Avatar's ASS...what???

He can't read your mind (or focus in school, or stop getting mugged, or control his sexual fantasies, or get a date with a girl unless he pretends to be gay) but he CAN kick your ass.

Ladies and gentlemen, I am here to make the declaration that Kick-Ass > Avatar OR any other film to grace the silver screen in the past year.

Seriously, Kick-Ass made me laugh, cry, and clutch my boyfriend's hand in terror. It was incredible. What I thought was going to be some kind of Watchmen/Superbad spoof turned out to be a Daredevil/Watchmen/X-Men mash-up blended all together with a healthy dose of Quentin-Tarantino-style violence and narration. As young, angsty Dave Lizewski attempts to right some of the wrongs in his violence ridden neighborhood and unfulfilled personal life, he finds himself up against bigger forces of good (and evil) than he could have ever possibly imagined. Namely: an ex-cop with a serious vendetta, his bloodthirsty pre-teen daughter, and a mob-boss with a socially inept son.

He also gets the girl, which is an added bonus, I guess.

Anyway, one of the biggest selling points of this movie for me was the fact that Nicholas Cage was a lead role, and I DIDN'T ABHOR EVERY SECOND HE WAS ON THE SCREEN. It was like his character was one giant apology for every film he's ever ruined. When Mr. Cage makes a film instead of breaking it, you know it's a must-see.

Secondly, the characterization of all the leads was expertly revealed throughout the plot. Cage's character (Big Daddy...I know, I know, but it's the movie's only flaw) seems at face value to be like any other crime fighting vigilante you always seem to find in the dirtiest parts of New York. However, he turns out to be a borderline psychopath who has to balance caring for his young daughter who he obviously loves desperately, and turning her into a tiny killing machine/partner with which to enact his vengeance on the mob boss who caused the suicide of his wife and his false imprisonment. His internal conflicts parallel Dave/Kick-Ass', as he tries to figure out how to be a functioning member of the teenage society, with all its hormones and anxieties, as well as perform the duties of a kick-ass superhero. And convince the girl of his dreams that he wants to be more than her gay BFF. The mobster's son, a kid Dave's age, also becomes conflicted when he enters the world of hero-wannabe's under his own costumed facade, and then has to choose between the awkward good intentions of almost ordinary people, or the live executions and drug deals that make his father's world, and the business he so desperately wants to run one day.


All that English nerd-type stuff aside, the movie was a lot more violent than I expected, but it was in that Sin City, Tarantino-y way that is both comical, horrifying, and above all, awesome. Kick-Ass also packed the quick-paced satirical humor that one does not generally associate with movies that involve people exploding in giant microwaves and the use of phrases like "rip his lungs out through his ass." Yeah, Kick-Ass was all about the kind of laughs that are not spawned from humor so much as a nervous reaction to something gruesome.

That being said, the language and gore in the movie were necessary to make it as amazing as it was. It's not very often that a film about teenage superheroes contains laughs, horror, and pulse-racing drama. I had a hard time getting out of the my seat as the end credits started to roll. I was still taking in the past two hours of entertainment, and how they had absolutely blown my mind. Please go see it, because films that kick your ass AND make you think are few and far between.


Oh, and PS-- already a movie star at thirteen, Chloe Moretz (Hit-Girl) was AMAZING, and by far my favorite character. I hope we get to see a lot more from her in this vein in the future.


PPS-- If this blog hasn't convinced you to see Kick-Ass: THERE'S A BAZOOKA. And it's used.

Guess that's all for now :) Come back soon to hear about why Spring Break is awesomer when your boyfriend's a philosophy major (BUM BUM BUM...)

Love,
MAnDers!